What Is the 68 Position?
Okay, so let me be real with you: I used to think I knew all the sex positions worth knowing. Missionary, doggy, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, and of course… the infamous 69. But then I stumbled upon the 68 position, and oh honey, it completely rewired how I think about mutual pleasure and body confidence in the bedroom.
Let me be upfront: the 68 position is an absolute game-changer, especially if you crave intimacy, but sometimes struggle with balancing pleasure and performance. Whether you’re plus-size, have mobility limitations, or just want something a little less “acrobatics required,” this position is incredibly empowering and deeply satisfying.
I’m going to walk you through everything you never learned in sex ed about the 68. We’ll cover what it is, why it’s amazing, how to do it safely, how it supports consent and communication, and why it’s a body-positive dream come true.
Origins and Meaning Behind the Name
The name “68” is clever, and like many things in the pleasure space, it’s a playful twist on the classic “69.” But there’s a subtle difference. The number suggests a sequence: one partner gives, the other receives. It’s about prioritizing your partner’s pleasure first, knowing yours is coming next.
Unlike the simultaneous nature of 69, the 68 position focuses more on taking turns while still staying physically connected. For many people (myself included), this takes off a lot of mental pressure and brings a sense of patience, care, and control into bed that changes everything.
How It Differs from the 69 Position
In 69, both partners give and receive oral at the same time, which can be awkward, rushed, or even uncomfortable depending on body size and positioning.
But in 68, one partner is focused entirely on pleasing the other without performance pressure. The receiving partner lays down with their head near the giving partner’s pelvis. The giving partner then hovers or kneels over, focusing on oral pleasure.
This position doesn’t just relieve multitasking fatigue – it also makes it far easier for bodies of different sizes and abilities to navigate oral with confidence and comfort.
Physical and Emotional Benefits
Increased Body Confidence
Here’s the deal: one of the top reasons people avoid oral positions like 69 is because they’re super self-conscious about how they look or smell or sound during sex. I’ve been there. But the 68 position naturally allows for more flexibility, less pressure, and less “exposure” all at once.
Your body is angled in a way that feels supportive, not spotlighted. If you’re plus-size or curvy, you’ll especially appreciate how the pressure is evenly distributed – no one’s face is smushed, nothing feels awkwardly angled, and your curves are not a problem, they’re part of the pleasure.
Enhanced Mutual Pleasure and Intimacy
Since you’re focusing on just one partner at a time, the 68 actually allows you to go deeper – physically and emotionally. Eye contact isn’t always possible in traditional mutual oral, but in 68, the connection is more sensual and thoughtful.
It creates space for prolonged touch, gentle teasing, and deeper trust. And once you flip and return the favor? That suspense? Unmatched.
Trust and Vulnerability in the Moment
Yes, the 68 position is hot. But it also builds something even hotter: trust. One of you is fully receiving. The other is fully giving. That builds a dynamic of care, surrender, and respect that can be incredibly connective, especially if you’re new to taking up space or asking for what you want.
This is especially powerful for folks who struggle with body image or who’ve been taught that pleasure has to be earned. It doesn’t. Pleasure is your birthright, full stop.
How to Try the 68 Position Safely and Comfortably
Best Setup and Technique
Start by having the receiving partner lie comfortably on their back, knees bent or legs relaxed. A pillow under the hips can help elevate your pelvis for better access – especially for soft bodies or bellies that need just a little lift.
The giver then kneels over their partner, but instead of facing their partner’s face, they face their partner’s pelvis, giving oral while either on their knees or elbows – whatever’s most comfortable.
Personally, I swear by wedge pillows or adjustable sex furniture like the Liberator Ramp. It gives amazing angle control with zero strain. Highly recommend it for bigger bodies or anyone with joint sensitivity.
Tips for Enhancing Comfort and Pleasure
- Use plenty of lube – even for oral. A flavored water-based lube can make the experience wetter and more enjoyable for both of you.
- Prop and support! Pillows under knees, neck, or hips make a huge difference. (I even keep a stack of rolled towels nearby just in case.)
- Take breaks without breaking the mood. Just switch it up with hands, kisses on thighs, or a slow touch everywhere else.
- Music, low lighting, and mood-setting are part of the comfort equation too. Let your senses soften into the moment.
Communication and Consent
I can’t stress this enough: all positions – especially those that involve prolonged giving or receiving – require active communication and pre-agreements. Don’t just jump in!
Before trying 68, talk about limits, check in on each other’s comfort zones, and most importantly, establish that anything can slow down or stop if needed. Real intimacy lives in enthusiasm and clarity, not assumptions.
Empowerment Through Sexual Confidence
Body Positivity in the Bedroom
We’re constantly told that only thin, acrobatic people can enjoy adventurous sex. That’s a lie – and I’m proof of it. The 68 position has given me, and many of my clients, the ability to feel sensual, sexy, and supported all at once.
Your belly doesn’t disqualify you from oral sex. Your thighs don’t get in the way of intimacy. In fact, allowing your body to rest into pleasure is one of the most radical acts of body love you can practice.
Breaking Taboos and Embracing Exploration
Positions like this invite us to break free from outdated scripts around how sex “should” look. They let us play, re-discover forgotten erogenous zones, and let go of pressure to impress.
Exploring new dynamics like 68 tells your body: I trust you. I listen to you. And I want to know what you love. That’s not just sexy. That’s healing.
Common Misconceptions and FAQs
Is the 68 Position Only for Certain Body Types?
Nope. Not at all. That’s one of the things I adore about this position: it welcomes every body. If adjustments are needed, use pillows or wedges. If you need to pause, reposition, or modify the angle – do it!
There’s no one-size-fits-all way to have loving, satisfying sex. The goal isn’t perfection. It’s presence and pleasure.
Can This Position Work for All Couples?
Absolutely. The 68 position works across gender pairings, orientation, and even mobility levels. Just like with everything in sex, it’s about adapting it to your body and your desires. You can do this with toys if penetration isn’t your thing or oral isn’t accessible.
Try a strap, a handheld vibrator (I love the We-Vibe Touch for external stimulation), or mutual massage in place of direct oral. The structure of the 68 is flexible – the intention is mutual devotion, not acrobatics.
Final Thoughts on Practicing Intimacy with Confidence
If you take nothing else from this guide, let it be this: there is no “perfect” body or “right” way to enjoy sex.
The 68 position is simply one powerful, intimate, and body-loving way to prioritize slowness, generosity, and consent in your sexual connection.
Try it. Modify it. Make it your own. And remember – every body is a good body for pleasure. Yours included.
