I’ll be honest with you – the first time I tried the scissors sex style position, I had no idea what I was doing. It looked amazing in diagrams, sure, but when I actually attempted it with a partner? Arms flailing, legs slipping, full-blown giggle fest. But let me tell you this: once we figured it out and adapted it to our bodies (both soft, curvy, and not super-flexible), it became one of the most emotionally and physically intimate positions we’d ever explored.
If you’ve been curious about trying something new that promises connection, arousal, and raw closeness, the scissors sex style position might be exactly what your sex life is craving. I know this position can feel inaccessible if you don’t see your body type in erotic manuals or movies, but that’s why I’m here – to show you that yes, this is 100% for you too.
So whether you’re a plus-size babe, a same-sex couple, a long-time hetero marriage looking to reignite the spice, or just curious AF, this guide is your full-access, human-to-human breakdown of how to do scissoring in a way that’s sexy, safe, and deeply satisfying.
What Is the Scissors Sex Style Position?
Basic Overview and Visual Orientation
The scissors sex position (sometimes called “scissoring” or “tribbing”) involves two people interlocking their legs like, well… scissors. One partner’s inner thigh overlaps or presses against the other’s inner thigh or pelvic area. There’s usually a clitoral grind motion involved – forward, backward, or circular – and this creates incredible friction, no penetration required.
Visually, think two bodies lying on their sides, angled toward each other, one leg between the other’s legs. It can be gentle or passionate, depending on your energy.
Origins and Popularity in LGBTQ+ and Heterosexual Contexts
Scissoring has long been associated with sex between women, though it’s been misrepresented and often dismissed (especially by mainstream porn for being “not real sex” – which is absolute nonsense). Real queer women and femmes have reclaimed it as a position of power, intimacy, and connection.
Heterosexual couples are increasingly adding it to their repertoire, too. And hooray for that! It’s not about anatomy – it’s about bodies rubbing, grinding, and moving in rhythm. With or without penetration, it’s intimate magic when done right.
Benefits of the Scissors Position
Emotional and Intimate Connection
This isn’t a fast-thrust rhythm. This is face-to-face eye contact. It’s shared breath. It’s body weight and warmth pressing together. You can whisper, laugh, or moan while actually seeing your partner’s reactions in real time.
I’ve found this kind of positioning builds a special kind of body-level trust. You’re fully exposed. It’s vulnerable, but also wildly connecting.
Physical Stimulation Advantages
If you have a clitoris, labia, or just love being stimulated by friction, this one delivers. The scissoring grind hits those frontal erogenous zones beautifully. You can increase intensity with pelvic movement, pressing thighs, or swiveling hips.
Using a well-placed pillow under one hip or a silicone wedge (shout-out to the Liberator pillow – I swear by it) can help you adjust angles for better pressure or alignment.
Empowerment and Body Confidence
The first time I scissored with the lights fully on, body rolls and stretch marks in full view, I felt something shift. There’s a raw confidence that bursts through when you stop adjusting for “flattering angles” and simply lock in on sensation.
Scissoring encourages exploration rather than performance. You can’t hold it if you’re being anything but real. And that’s freeing AF.
How to Perform the Scissors Position Safely and Comfortably
Step-by-Step Setup
- Start by both lying on your sides, facing each other.
- Hook one leg over and around your partner’s opposite leg, so your thighs are interlocked. You should now be in a loose “X” or scissors shape.
- Scoot your pelvises toward each other until your groins are touching. It’s okay if your thighs are pressing – that’s the point.
- Use your hands to support yourself, or prop a pillow under your hip for better friction control.
- Begin to grind slowly – circular, back-and-forth, or diagonal movements work well.
Pro tip: Take your time finding the right alignment. The position gets easier (and hotter) with practice!
Essential Tips for Balance and Comfort
- Use lubricants generously. Even without penetration, skin-on-skin can get dry and ruin the mood.
- If your legs slip, shift slightly so one partner holds their lower leg under and the other raises their thigh above – kind of creating a staggered elevation.
- Pillows are your BFF. Tuck them under knees, hips, or even backs to maintain alignment and take strain off joints.
Best Positions for Different Body Types
Speaking from experience as a plus-size woman, lateral scissoring (both lying on your side) is the most accessible. It takes pressure off joints and allows easier hip rotations.
If you have mobility limitations, start with one partner fully reclined and the other at a diagonal atop their thigh. This allows you to ease in while still engaging pelvic connection. No need to force full “scissor shape” if it’s not practical for your bodies.
Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them
Flexibility and Movement Limitations
You don’t need to be a yogi to scissor. Truly. But tight hips or limited motion can make initial setup feel awkward. Start small. Prop yourself up with cushions. Go at your own pace. There’s no rush to “nail” it instantly.
Try stretching beforehand or switch to a modified version where one partner keeps both legs flat while the other adjusts on top. Adaptation equals success.
Communication and Intimacy Barriers
Many folks feel shy suggesting this position. I get it. It’s vulnerable and outside the hetero norm.
What’s worked for me? Frame the conversation around curiosity and sensation. “I think it would be really sexy to try this position that’s all about grinding and eye contact…” gets a much warmer reception than “I saw this thing called scissoring, wanna try it?”
Variations to Explore
Lying vs. Upright Scissoring
Flat-on-the-bed is classic, but if you’re feeling energetic, try seated scissoring propped on a couch or bed edge. Facing each other, both sitting, legs interlocked and grinding. It brings more core muscle into play and allows for additional kissing and connection up top.
Incorporating Toys or Props
Dildos with harnesses, suction cups, or even double-ended toys can add penetration to scissoring. Stick to body-safe silicone and get something flexible enough to move with your rhythm.
Also worth trying: vibrating toys like a We-Vibe or clit-stim cock ring between you – especially heavenly if your bodies don’t fully align genitally. Total game changer.
Adapting the Position for Non-Vaginal Sex
Scissoring isn’t just for clit-on-clit! Everyone has erogenous zones. Interlocking legs and grinding works wonders for prostatate play, outer shaft stimulation, and even sensory pressure if you’re playing with pegging or strokers.
Your pelvis is a playground. Use it.
Who Can Benefit Most from the Scissors Sex Position?
Same-Sex Female Couples
This technique has been a lesbian and queer female staple for generations, despite media myths. It builds a soulful connection and brings full-body involvement to clitoral sex. If that’s your anatomy duo, give it a real shot.
Heterosexual Couples Looking to Try New Positions
Guys – this isn’t just eye candy. Scissoring offers unique entry points for inter-thigh contact, teasing, and variation from thrust-centric positions.
Try mutual thigh grinding or soft pegging positions. Unexpected positions can be wildly satisfying when approached without ego.
People Seeking More Intimate, Less Thrust-Driven Sex
If high-energy pounding isn’t your thing (or simply not in the cards post-surgery, during chronic flare-ups, or as a sensory preference), scissoring gives you connection, stimulation, and slow sex energy without performance pressure.
Scissors Position and the Power of Sexual Connection
Strengthening Relationship Trust and Vulnerability
Scissoring invites openness. You’re literally facing each other – no hiding. There’s laughter, nose brushes, sweat, emotion – it’s all here. I credit this position with unlocking a new level of trust with a former partner.
Integrating the Position Into a Fulfilling Sex Life
Use it as a warm-up. Make it the main course. Come back to it on Sunday mornings when you want lazy rhythm and electric connection. It doesn’t need to replace what works – it just expands your menu.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does Scissoring Lead to Orgasm?
It absolutely can. Clitoral/mound pressure + eye contact + body-sync = powerful, even multiple orgasms. That said, orgasm is never the only goal. Sometimes it’s about feeling seen and loved in every grindy stroke.
Is the Scissors Position Only for Women?
Nope! It’s for anyone with genitals and a curious heart. All genders and orientations can incorporate the interlocking leg position in their own erotic way. It’s more about motion and energy than anatomy.
How Can I Talk to My Partner About Trying It?
Use visual aids. Send this article. Make it sexy, not clinical. Say something like “I saw this position where we lock legs and just… rub into each other while watching each other react… Want to try?”
Consent and curiosity pave the way.
Bottom line? The scissors sex style position is an unforgettable way to connect with your partner and your body. It doesn’t require flexibility, porn-perfection, or acrobatics – just a willingness to try, explore, and adapt. And in that process? You might just find your new favorite way to feel sexy, witnessed, and wildly, deeply desired.
