Let’s be real: the legs behind head sex position can seem like one of those “acrobatic myth” positions you only see in porn or fitness circles. For years, I thought this move was only for ultra-flexible, yoga-loving twenty-somethings with zero belly rolls and limitless leg mobility.
But here’s the truth I wish someone told me sooner: this position is not out of reach. It’s not just possible for more bodies than you think – it can be wildly pleasurable, deeply intimate, and totally body-celebrating with the right mindset, prep, and communication.
As a sex educator and body-positive advocate, I’m here to show you how to *actually* make the legs behind head sex position work for your body – whether you’re curvy, stiff, nervous, or just plain curious. Because pleasure should never exclude anyone.
What Is the Legs Behind Head Sex Position?
Definition and Visual Description
The legs behind head sex position involves one partner lying on their back while bringing their legs up and back so that the knees are near or behind the head. The penetrating partner straddles or kneels in front, allowing for deep vaginal or anal penetration.
Yes, it’s an intense-looking position, but don’t let that scare you. It’s basically an advanced version of missionary, with the receiving partner’s hips lifted and legs elevated for more angle and depth.
Common Variations of the Pose
- Modified Folded Missionary: You lift your hips with a pillow and bring your legs toward your chest, but not fully behind your head.
- Hands-Assisted Fold: You (or your partner) use hands to gently hold or support your thighs during penetration.
- Using Support Props: With yoga blocks or wedges under the back or hips, this pose becomes dramatically easier for tight hamstrings or larger tummies.
Benefits of the Position
Enhanced Depth and Intimacy
This position allows for deep penetration, which can hit different pleasure zones—G-spot, A-spot, even more pressure on the backside—for some truly mind-melting sensations. And because your bodies are so close, there’s a delicious intensity to eye contact, breath, and skin-to-skin connection.
Physical and Emotional Connection
There’s a vulnerability in exposing your body like this – and that’s not a bad thing. Being open, both physically and emotionally, can deepen feelings of trust and closeness with your partner.
Plus, let’s not ignore the built-in ego boost when your partner sees you rocking this bold position – “hot” doesn’t begin to cover it.
Is This Position Right for You?
Body Types and Flexibility Considerations
If you’re not hypermobile or flexible, that’s okay. This position might not be fully accessible right now, or ever in the textbook form – but there are workarounds, and I’ll walk you through each one.
What matters is respecting your body’s limits and knowing there’s no one way to do anything in bed. My thick thighs and tight hips don’t keep me out of pleasure – they just reshape the way I enter it.
Mental Comfort and Consent
Here’s where emotional safety comes in: if even trying this position brings up feelings of body shame, pressure to perform, or any internalized “I’m not sexy enough” talk, pause.
You deserve sex that is safe, celebrated, and centered around mutual desire – never forced approval or performance.
How to Prepare Safely
Stretching and Warm-Up Exercises
Don’t just jump into an intense stretch mid-heat. I recommend these gentle consistency-building stretches:
- Reclined hamstring stretch: Lying on your back, loop a yoga strap or towel around your foot and pull your leg gently toward your body.
- Happy baby pose: Lie down, knees wide and drawn toward chest, holding feet or ankles. It opens the hips beautifully.
- Pelvic tilts and hip rolls: Great for warming up the lower back and strengthening the core for pelvic control during sex.
Communication and Setting Expectations
Say it with me: “Sex doesn’t need to look like a magazine to be amazing.” Talk with your partner beforehand. Try something new together, with curiosity, not pressure. Use phrases like:
- “Let’s experiment and laugh through it if we fall over.”
- “I’m down to try, but let’s take it slow.”
- “Check in with me if it feels like too much, and I’ll do the same.”
Tips for Getting Into the Position
Step-by-Step Guide
- Lie on your back with your hips slightly elevated (a firm pillow or wedge really helps here).
- Bring one leg at a time toward your chest, then gently pull back toward your shoulders.
- If comfortable, continue moving your legs out and sliding them behind your head.
- Have your partner move between your legs and support your thighs if needed.
Use of Props or Pillows for Support
- Liberator sex wedges: Game-changing for pelvic elevation and support (especially if you’re heavier in the middle).
- Knee pillows: Place under the neck or knees when transitioning in or out of the pose.
- Under-bed straps: Can assist by giving you something to hold or brace against for added control and comfort.
Comfort and Safety First
Listening to Your Body
If your thighs start burning, your back arches uncomfortably, or you feel pinching anywhere – stop or shift. Pain is not part of pleasure.
Your body is giving you essential data. There’s always another angle, another position, another adventure worth having in its place.
Risk of Strain or Injury
This is not a “push through it” situation. Pushing past your body’s limits, especially in positions requiring flexibility, can lead to strains, muscle pulls, or overextended ligaments – not fun, not hot.
Modifications for Beginners and Less Flexible Bodies
Alternative Positions for Similar Sensations
- Deep missionary with legs up: A pillow under your butt and legs simply over your partner’s shoulders increases depth with less strain.
- Bent-over doggy (with support): You kneel with chest on the bed while your hips stay lifted. Amazing angle, less body pressure.
- Pillow-stack bridge: Lie with your hips on two pillows, knees bent, and thighs open. An easier angle, still intimate and penetrative.
Partner-Assisted Adjustments
Have your partner gently lift your legs for you or use their hands to help support your weight. This isn’t weakness – it’s teamwork. Honestly, nothing builds bedroom trust faster than helping each other feel supported and sexy at the same time.
Building Confidence and Trust
Overcoming Insecurity and Self-Doubt
Listen, I spent years covering up my belly with my hands during sex, thinking that was “hot etiquette.” But when I finally let go and allowed myself to be seen – stomach, cellulite, jiggle and all – pleasure changed for me. It became embodied, electric, real.
The confidence to try bold positions like legs behind head doesn’t start with yoga—it starts with saying, “I’m worthy of trying this.” Even if you fall over or fart mid-pose (been there!), you’re still sexy as hell for showing up in your body.
Body Positivity and Mutual Encouragement
Normalize hyping each other up. Say:
- “Damn, you look so good like that.”
- “I love seeing your body do that.”
- “We make a hot team.”
Romantic partners are not judges or critics. They’re lucky participants. Treat the bedroom like a safe zone for affirmations, not evaluations.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Forcing the Position Without Prep
Don’t treat this like a one-night dare. Warm up. Stretch. Communicate. This is literally a body fold – not a last-minute thrill.
Ignoring Discomfort Signs
Shortness of breath, numb toes, back strain = time to pivot. The goal isn’t to “achieve” a position. It’s to feel amazing inside it.
Conclusion: Owning Your Pleasure with Assurance
The legs behind head sex position is not a prize for the flexible or the thin – it’s a possibility for anyone who’s curious and willing to explore with care.
There’s nothing more empowering than seeing your body do something bold, feel something deeper, or connect in a way that reminds you: you are not just capable of pleasure – you are built for it.
So be patient. Be playful. Be hella proud of your body, wherever it takes you. Pleasure belongs to you. Period.