Okay, let’s get real for a second: Trying new sex positions can feel… intimidating. Especially when you’ve heard names like “the pretzel” and immediately imagined a Cirque du Soleil audition. But I’m here to tell you, as someone who has studied, practiced, and taught about accessible, pleasure-filled sex for years… the pretzel sex position is not just doable – it’s AMAZING. And yes, it can work for all kinds of bodies (including mine and maybe yours, too).
If you’ve ever felt like your size, flexibility, or stamina disqualified you from the “hot and creative sex” club, this guide is for you. So let’s break it all down in a no-shame, body-affirming, step-by-step way because pleasure doesn’t require a gymnastic gold medal – just connection, curiosity, and a little guidance.
What Is the Pretzel Sex Position?
Overview and Description
The pretzel sex position is one part side-lying, one part scissor-style, and one hundred percent delicious. It’s a partner-on-the-side setup where one partner lies flat or partially reclined, and the other straddles and enters from the side.
This position creates a half-twisted configuration that looks a bit like, well… a pretzel. Don’t worry – I’ll walk you through it. What matters is that it offers deep penetration, close body contact, and a leg configuration that opens up some powerful angles for pleasure.
Why It’s Called the “Pretzel”
It gets its quirky name from the shape your legs make – especially the bottom partner’s bent knee and the top partner’s stacked legs. But don’t let the name throw you off. The position might sound tangled, but it’s actually one of the most grounded and support-friendly positions I teach.
Benefits of the Pretzel Position
Enhanced Intimacy and Eye Contact
Unlike doggy style or missionary, the pretzel gives you a close-up view of your partner’s expressions, while keeping your bodies close enough to feel every shift and grind. If emotional connection is part of your turn-on (it sure is for me), this position feeds that flame.
Ideal for Deep Penetration and G-Spot Access
This configuration allows the penetrating partner to hit angles that stimulate the G-spot or P-spot with almost surgical precision. The leg elevation opens up the pelvic area, allowing deep, stimulating thrusts that feel intense but controlled.
Comfort and Control for Both Partners
I love teaching this position to folks who need gentle joint support or tire easily during sex. Because both partners can rest part of their weight on the bed and adjust their angles without pressure on knees, wrists, or elbows, the pretzel supports longer sessions with less strain.
How to Do the Pretzel Sex Position
Step-by-Step Guide
- Start with one partner lying on their side – let’s call them Partner A.
- Partner B kneels over Partner A’s bottom leg, straddling it lightly.
- Partner A bends their top leg at the knee, and Partner B holds or braces against it.
- Partner B enters from the side facing Partner A, while maintaining contact along the torso and thighs.
- Adjust positioning by shifting hips, angles, or how far Partner A’s leg is bent.
Pro tip: The side-to-side entry angle creates different sensations than a forward-facing thrust, so give yourselves time to explore and find your rhythm.
Best Angles and Adjustments
- If penetration is too shallow or misses the mark, try angling Partner B’s hips lower or using a wedge under Partner A’s back for lift.
- Need more support? Place a firm pillow under Partner A’s top knee to prevent overextension or wobble.
- Going for G-spot intensity? Tilt Partner A’s pelvis forward slightly by guiding their lower back with your palm.
Tips for Comfort, Confidence, and Pleasure
Talk, Tune In, and Take Your Time
This is not a position to rush into or out of. Talk to your partner. Ask what feels good, if pressure needs adjusting, or if angle tweaks are necessary.
I always suggest couples treat the pretzel like a scenic detour rather than a race to orgasm. Explore pressure, pace, and movement – and don’t be afraid to laugh if a foot slips. Sex is supposed to feel good, not perfect.
Recommended Positions for Plus-Size Bodies
As a plus-size person myself, I can vouch: The pretzel is a winner. Why? Because lying on your side removes pressure from back and knees, while your partner is able to maneuver from a seated or kneeling position instead of having to plank or hover.
Get creative with pillows behind your lower back, under your hip, or between knees to create more lift, comfort, and support. The bottom partner’s bent leg helps create space and control regardless of belly or thigh size – no need to fold or scrunch uncomfortably.
Adding Pillows and Props for Support
You don’t need fancy sex furniture, but if you like that idea, the Liberator Wedge or Ramp can work wonders here. Otherwise, firm pillows from your couch can lift hips and align spines beautifully.
I swear by a U-shaped maternity body pillow to support hips, back, and knees in positions like this – it’s a game-changer for folks with joint or mobility issues.
Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them
Mismatched Rhythm or Positioning
Without face-to-face alignment, it’s easy to lose sync. One partner may start thrusting faster than the other is ready for – trust me, I’ve been there.
Stay present and check in. Use your hand on their thigh or butt as a signal for tempo. Don’t hesitate to pause, reset, and keep it playful rather than pressuring.
Overextension and Discomfort Signs
Pain is never the price of pleasure. If knees feel stretched or hips locked, stop immediately and reposition.
Sometimes that means switching sides halfway through the session (your body is not symmetrical!), or adjusting the top leg to a lower angle to reduce strain.
How to Introduce the Pretzel Position in Your Relationship
Communicating Desires and Boundaries
You don’t need to come in hot with “Let’s try the pretzel!” Instead, try something like: “I read about this side position that sounds kind of cozy and hot – would you be into trying it?”
Curiosity rather than expectations opens up dialogue and keeps things low pressure. Set boundaries. Agree that you’ll both speak up if anything feels off or uncomfortable.
Building Confidence with New Positions
I always suggest “trying out” a new position outside of active sex first – maybe with lube, maybe fully clothed, maybe just as a little exploration moment. It makes the real thing feel less intimidating and more fun.
And remember: Being willing to explore together is incredibly sexy. You don’t have to nail it to feel connected or turned on.
Variations to Explore for More Pleasure
Different Leg Placements
Try bending the bottom partner’s top leg higher or flatter. Place the top partner’s knee on the bed or around the underside of the leg. Even small changes create huge shifts in sensation and comfort.
Leg flexibility isn’t a requirement – creativity is. Rest a foot on the bed’s headboard, grab a thigh, or try looping your arm under a knee for lift without strain.
Pretzel with Toys or Vibrators
This position is excellent for adding clit or perineal stimulation. I recommend a hands-free wearable vibe like the We-Vibe Chorus or using a wand vibrator against the outside of the pelvic bone during penetration.
If one partner isn’t being penetrated, the pretzel allows easy access to butt plugs or dual-stimulation toys. Use lube – always – and keep toys within reach on the nightstand or under your pillow.
Final Thoughts on Embracing the Pretzel Position
Here’s what I know for sure: The pretzel sex position changed the game for me. It proved that yes, positions can be hot, deep, and intimate… without demanding flexibility I don’t have, or sacrificing comfort I absolutely deserve.
And if you’ve ever felt left out of the “spicy” sex conversation because of your body, please hear me – you belong.
So the next time you want to mix up your bedroom routine with something that’s passionate, intimate, and 100% body-affirming… roll into the pretzel.
And as always, I’m cheering you on. Pleasure is your birthright.
